Tuesday, June 19, 2012

How to Speak to Aging Parents About Their time to come

Veterans Donations - How to Speak to Aging Parents About Their time to come
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Speaking to aging parents about their future, is literally a conversation about mortality, and that is not an easy conversation to undertake at any age. The top 7 things to reconsider when speaking to an elderly man about their time to come are

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1. What should happen in the event the man cannot make decisions about their own life? Do they want to be kept on life support? Who is in fee of making the decision to end life sustaining equipment? Somebody must assume the power of attorney. This decision should be made while the man is of sound mind, and hopefully left to somebody who is also of sound mind. Put the decision in writing, and have it notarized.

2. Is there a will? Who is the designated executor of the will. This is dissimilar from who is the beneficiary of the will. The executor of the will is the man who is in fee of distributing the assets of the will, and assures that assets are distributed legally correct.

3. What are the financial resources ready to care for the time to come of an aging person? This will resolve housing and medical options in the event, the parent needs assisted living care. Medicare benefits need to be considered. Veterans programs and entitlements need to be evaluated. How much money does the parent have to make it through their life? If there are inadequate resources, what arrangements will be made. If there is fullness of money and ready resources, would a living trust make sense, so that money can be left to heirs? A living trust can be beneficial, so that resources can be distributed to heirs without being wiped out by medical costs.

4. Where does the man want to be buried? Do they want to be buried or would they prefer cremation? What does the man want to have happen to their remains? Having recently had this conversation with my Dad, I can tell you this is not an easy conversation.

5. Does the man want to have an autopsy? Do they want to donate portions of their body to science?

6. Where is all the critical paperwork? Where is the will? Financial papers? critical documents?

7. What are the medical resources available? Who is the customary care physician? comprehensive in planning the time to come of aging parents, know the ready resources, and know where leading papers are kept. Understand who should be contacted in an emergency. Getting as much data in writing will forestall problems down the road, in the event the parent is unable to care for themselves.

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